Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Hose Em Down!

A foam is any substance formed by trapping a lot of gas bubbles in a liquid or solid. Solid foams, like polyurethane, polystyrene and polisocyanurate are excellent thermal insulators.

Besides causing anticipation every time I order a Guiness, liquid foams have excellent fire extinguishing abilities (particularly in fighting class B fires -- burning flammable liquids).

Though not a foam, fiberglass insulation is naturally fire retardant. Owens Corning's PINK brand is an industry leader, not only for its durability but also for its long-standing licensing agreement with the Pink Panther cartoon.

Friday, May 26, 2006


Chocolate, candied ginger, mangoes, early Phillip K. Dick novels, Kurt Vonnegut, Delillo's White Noise, The Simpsons, Dead Can Dance, The Flaming Lips, Poi Dog Pondering.
Looking Down

Rock climbing is dangerous. Stand to the right, walk to the left.

Disney is dangerous. Stand back.

Smoking is dangerous. Stand still.

Thursday, May 25, 2006


I don't own a car. It's worth every bummed ride, every late subway train. I don't have to find parking. I don't have to buy gas or insurance. I don't have to worry about crashing or needing repairs.

I bought my bike a year ago in the Adams Morgan neighborhood of DC. It's a Dahon folder. Fits in my closet. Looks cool. Has eight speeds. Gets me to work in 15 minutes.

I don't own a house. I live in a small studio apartment in the U Street corridor of DC. I can walk to work. There are three grocery stores within an 8 block radius. I have many bars to choose from and a beautiful park just out the building's entrance.

I bought a large jade plant from Home Depot. It looks like a mini tree and I forget to water it sometimes. It makes me feel happy when I look at it. Not as happy as coming home to a dog jumping into my arms, but happy.

BLOG SWARM OF NOTE: Stop Blog & Roll

This is Not Real

Roger Water's Radio Kaos tells the story of a young Billy who is a vegetable. Billy can receive radio waves in his mind. He learns to manipulate the waves to call a local anarchist radio station. Oh yeah, and he takes control of the world's nuclear weapons and detonates all of them. It's only a simulation. No one dies.

When we are asleep, our body is paralyzed. During dreams our minds go through the same synaptic responses used during the day. According to our minds, the simulation of our dream world is the same as our real world.

Reality television is a controlled simulation of real-life experiences. Nonetheless, the general public reads reality television as the real deal. Fans of American Idol become attached to their favorites and have begun to suspect a conspiracy.

I bought an XBOX 360 on Tuesday. I bought a racing game called Burnout Revenge. The game allows me to drive at 200 miles an hour and fuck shit up. In fact, the more cars I crash, the higher my score and the faster I can go. I do not own a car. I ride a bicycle. Since Wednesday, my biking has become a bit erratic. I swerve a little more and I have been trying to ride as fast as I can. I haven't had the urge to crash into any moving vehicles, but I'm worried I might run into a wall or a parked car. I do not own a helmet. I'm going to buy a helmet today.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

I'm Wrapped in Goodness

Contrary to popular belief, the Twinkie's shelf life is 25 days.

According to its website's metatags, Moonpies are the "CyberSnack" of the 21st Century.

Little Debbie of snack cake fame was modeled after a black-and-white photo of then four year-old Debbie McKee. The image was altered to make Debbie look older.

I ate my first Lara bar in Central Park while staring at a shirtless man. It was yummy.

I was given my first package of Emergen-c from a fellow bald coworker.

On the night of my senior prom, my mother gave me a gift bag including, among other things, my first package of condoms. I did not use them that night.

BLOG SWARM OF NOTE: Pulp Decameron

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

This blog ain't over.

Okay. I over reacted. I threw the goat a little far. Over shot my arrow. Jumped into the deep end. Painted the house and the yard. Digested my food and myself.

Trains are amazing. There are house boats. Are there house trains? I know, I know, circuses. But could I rent an apartment on Amtrak? That'd be sweet. Though I'd get sick of the cruddy microwaved breakfast sandwiches. No, honestly. Is it that tough to toast bread?

Two roosters meet each other in the middle of an arena. They're all full of adrenaline and ready to rip the other apart. The house goes wild. Yelling. Who wins? I don't care. This is a great excuse to buy some cotton candy.

George Stephanopolous walked into a deli on M Street this morning. John C. Reilly was pushing a stroller down a subway in Brooklyn last weekend. Kurt Loder walked down Broadway near 66th Street three weeks ago. Famous people are real.

Friday, May 19, 2006

This is Too Easy
Well folks. I'm closing up shop. All past blogs are on sale two fer one.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Hey There Sailor

I've been accused of being a naive idealist. I'm neither. What I am is open to the possibility that things are better than they seem.

That said, Richard Bach makes me nauseous. Deepak Chopra makes me think about a new age store in Florida where the books smell like incense 6 months after you buy them. And this community building workshop I am attending on Thursday at GEL 2006 worries me a little. I like my new age with a side of snark. I have a feeling the workshop is going to take itself too seriously.

Perhaps this is why I love performing and teaching improv. It's a good mix of touchy-feely and irreverence.

While I'm away for GEL, enjoy these Sesame Street treasures from YouTube.