IF I WERE: A Robot at the Ocean

I'd eat every 3.45 hours, making sure to drink dark beers for social lubrication.
The mosquitoes would be no match for my automatic hybrid fly swatter/bugsprayer plugin.
6 Megapixel manipulations of reality would take the place of reality. All the robots would be smiling and having a good time. The bad times would never have happened.
There would be no down time. Every moment would be calculated to achieve maximum fun and minimum expense.
The salt in the air would cleanse my circuits. I would be able to return to my city robot existence with more efficiency and less error messages.
I would be an ocean-loving, lobster-grubbing, tourist-hopping piece of work.