Control Issues

A remote control is a device used for the remote operation of a device or tool.

According to the Urban Dictionary, a tool is a person who lacks mental capacity. Someone who is being used. A fool, a cretin. A cheap piece of meat.

According to the January 26 Giant Circular for the Columbia Heights neighborhood of Washington DC, center cut pork loin chops are on sale for $2.99 a pound with your Bonus Card.

Jesus is Awesome

When I was a kid, I thought I was the Jesus of the monsters under my bed and in my closet.

Jesus Complex is the electro-industrial project of Damon Fries. Though originally from San Francisco, Damon moved to Amsterdam, The Netherlands in 1998 to escape the "extremity and hypocrisy of American culture."

"As we all know, Jesus fought corruption, hypocrisy, and the decadent power structure. He shook people up and you know what He got for that!"

I'm running for President on the monsters in my closet platform.

AMAZING THINGS

Foie gras is an engorged duck liver. It is also sweet love.

Betta fish breathe sweet air. That's why they don't need fancy filters.

Dogfish Head Brewery in Delaware brews vodka and gin aside from their yummy tasty IPAs.

JUST ACT NATURAL

"A Return to Normalcy" was Warren Harding's campaign slogan in 1920. Harding won over his opponent James Cox, a democrat from New Jersey.

New Jersey's state motto is "Liberty and Prosperity."

The official name of the Statue of Liberty is "La Liberté Éclairant Le Monde" or "Liberty Enlightens the World."

The interior of the planet Earth remains active, with a solid layer of convecting earth mantle and a solid iron ore core that generates a magnetic field.

Act for Love is a dating service for activists. Best of all, just by using ActForLove.org, you're helping to support progressive causes.

Pause

Listening is the ability and action of receiving information, often in the form of sound.

One of the traditional five senses and performed primarily by the auditory system, hearing is the ability to detect sound.

Active listening is the conscious decision to focus on a particular set of information, suspending one's own frame of reference and suspending judgement.

Meetings happen when two or more people agree to come together and discuss a predetermined topic.

Cognitive dissonance is the uncomfortable tension that comes from holding two conflicting thoughts at the same time.

I'm late for my appointment. Can we talk about this later?

C?R?O?W?D?E?D?

Crowded spaces are:
a. choking.
b. inspiring.
c. both choking and inspiring.

YOU DID WHAT?

I joined a church last weekend. I got dressed up, pinned a red flower to my shirt, repeated some words and had some folks congratulate me.

I'm not sure what I was expecting, but I really wanted more. Some sort of ritual involving bloodletting. Or a test. You know, take this pitcher of water and an everything bagel and sit on the banks of the Potomac for a month. So much for self-sacrifice.

This whole church business has reminded me how messed up the adult world is. We have our priorities all wack. Even in church. And so, I propose a New Reformed Church of Children.

Why do churches separate children from adults? If old people are allowed in, so should children. Old people and children have a lot in common, they're both chronologically closer to the meaning of life than the average adult. They may not be able to articulate it, but just watch a kid smile and you know you've got a little baby buddha throwing dharma at you in spades. Blow some bubbles from the altar and watch all the boys and girls do the right thing. Pop, pop, pop. Give a toddler the pulpit and you'll see Love in the darndest of places. Give up the structure of your important life and realize that you had this thing figured out years ago.

I'm going to bring this idea to the board of directors of my church. I think they'll eat it up.

[SECRET SERIOUS NOTE: Yes, I did join the church. Yes, I am happy. Yes, I think you are going to hell.]

NO RING

GETTING CLOSE

CHOOSE YOUR CHOICE

Little Rocket

Two things first, then first things second:
1. This is really important.
2. I'm a fact.

Can we be friends?

Tap Tap

I want in ya bastard people.

Let's Do This Thing #2

"It's just so much."

"Eat what you can. I'll feed the rest to the dogs."

"That's a good idea."

--

"It's just so much."

"Take her for a spin. If you don't like it, take it back."

"That's a good thought."

--

"It's just so much."

"Focus on the positive. You'll never have to pay for a meal again."

"That's a good point."

If I Were a Robot On Vacation

Using an advanced algorithm, I would forget the current day of the week.

Replace function would be used to convert work time to domino time, meeting time to shooting the shit time and break time to nap time.

The meaning of life would be compressed to food, water and pleasure.

Some Things Are Better Left Unsaid

Matt Sesow is a good friend and a great painter. He let me chat with him on April Fool's Day 2006. I've finally found time to round the audio files up and transcribe the conversation.

The first installment of the interview is on Rock Heals today.

Predominantly comprised of metal and other carbon-based materials, weapons are a thing of wonder. Used for murder, slaughter, slicing, dicing, destroying, defending and decorating, weapons can give any person, group, municipality, country or room an air of danger and malice.

Sloppy, errant destruction is a thing of the past. Today's weapons are created with a keen sense of purpose. They are not weapons for weapon's sake. They mean business and that's good news for the world's military industrial complex.

Weapons makers, dealers and smugglers have become today's jet set. They're practically stars in their own right. Without them, there'd be no fear, no reason to look behind your back. Without them, life would be a tad bit boring.

Start Touching Weapons
It's a matter of survival.

Stay Fresh

Pringles are a potato chip product produced by Procter and Gamble. Made from a fried dough of reconsituted potatoes, they are uniform, scrumptious and available in a variety of flavors.

Earl Tupper created a series of bowls with closures similar to paint can lids. Depending on the orientation of the closure, the lid is either slightly smaller or slightly bigger than the bowl's lip, creating an air-tight seal.

The modern wet suit is constructed of skintight neoprene, affording the human body limited protection from hypothermia in cold water conditions.

Turn Turn Turn

A pivot is a point or object on which something else turns. A shaft, a pin, a dime. A pivot doesn't do anything. But in being what it is, it lets other things do their thing.

BLOG SWARM OF NOTE: My friend Kate makes me love her even more with this brilliant and touching ode to her favorite South Korean food.

Critical Mass

Change can be intentional but it cannot be forced.
I want to be more attractive. I want to find my calling. I want to live in a paradise that includes but is not limited to: exquisite espresso, kind strangers and peaceful debates that end in community and a really cool block party.

The real subversive knows it's possible.

The Space Between Things

Mathematical space is not a tightly defined concept. In fact, mathematical space is a series of loosely related concepts: Euclidean space, vector space and dimensional space being examples.

Physical space is a basic unit of reality. It can't be broken down further, thus it is defined by measurement. Five feet. Ten feet. One million feet.

Personal space is the place between things. It's my blank face. It's why I didn't get up this morning at seven to meet for coffee. Space can't be broken down further.